to be honest, yeah.
i always told myself to keep art as a side hobby, to not tarnish it with the stress of studying it in school, of doing it as a job, of doing it for a salary, for money… but after a miserable semester of doing something i’m neither good at nor particularly fond of, i truly do wish i’d picked another major. i don’t feel like i’m particularly creative/good at art either, and there are certainly a ton of other people who are much more invested in it than i am, but at least i enjoy it (and even the humanities in general) more than i enjoy math. i can’t really make a fair comparison for programming seeing as i literally just programmed for the first time in my life less than 4 months ago. there are probably cooler—albeit 10293812 times more complex and super duper hard and tear inducing—classes to come.
that being said, i appreciate that computer science/programming is something of a “hard skill.” clearly, i’ve not mastered much of anything at this point, but i trust (or hope) that with time and a lot of hard work, i can improve and eventually be competent enough to get a job.
ideally, i want to study something that involves both the left and right sides of my brain. i really want to study human-computer interaction, which is basically an amalgam of computer science, design, and psychology. it’s offered as a second major at CMU, but 1) it’s competitive, and 2) my gpa most likely won’t be high enough for me to get in, so…
i suppose i don’t completely regret picking computer science then, since what i eventually want to do, or what i *think* i eventually want to do, all converges at a point that hovers between both art/design and computer science. i just imagine it would be a lot more bearable (not saying that it would be easier because design seems intimidating and difficult as heck too… just not as mentally, emotionally, and spiritually depressing for me personally) to work towards it from the other side. long story short, i wish i could major in something arts related with a technical slant, rather than something technical with an arts related slant.
